All that is gold does not glitter.....

I believe in magic.  To clarify, I do know that true magic doesn't exist in our world but I like to believe in the possibility of magic.  My favorite story will always be The Hobbit and Lord of The Rings trilogy.  J.R.R. Tolkien created a world where magic does exist.  A place full of diverse races (elves, dwarves, hobbits), wizards, extreme good & evil.  The world that Tolkien created has a complete history & background, and he richly described the places, the people, the politics.  An amazing story of people who will sacrifice themselves for the sake of others no matter the personal cost.  If you've never experienced this story, and can open your mind to the possibility of magic, please take the time to read all four books in sequence.  The Peter Jackson movies are good, but reading the story is by far more richly rewarding.

My favorite verse from this epic goes like this:

All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.
          by J.R.R. Tolkien from The Fellowship of the Ring

I like to believe in the possibility of magic.  As a teenager, for the longest time I dreamt, I prayed, I wished so hard that when I awoke in the morning some sort of magic would have happened, changing my body to that of a girl.  As I grew older I began to understand that this was not going to happen.  As much as I wished this, and realizing I was stuck the way I was, I eventually became so very angry, then depressed.  I turned my back on life, on the possibility of there being any kind of future for me.  I was too much of a coward to commit suicide at that time, so I did the next best thing.  I buried myself in alcohol and drugs, numbing myself to just get each day over with.

After wasting too many of the early years of my life that way, my soulmate came into my life.  Suffice it to say my attitude toward life changed, because unexpectedly it became very Shakespearean for me "..... what light through yonder window breaks?"

The feeling behind the Tolkien poem shown above has lately rung very true for me, especially that first line.  At this stage of my life I am an older woman, a senior citizen.  I do know I will never be as pretty and beautiful as the women on TV and in the movies.  I will always be a plain Jane, but I can live with that.  Because I do know exactly who I truly am.